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Edit Transcript - Woman With Dementia Gets Arrested For Beating Husband
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Woman With Dementia Gets Arrested For Beating Husband
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you know what you're useless you're useless to me I'm sure you're nice people you're useless to me you don't give a rat's ass what this man has said on January 16th 2023 at 700 p.m. officers were dispatched to a home for a domestic disturbance with injuries upon arrival one of the officers met Mr Roger Melman who stated that his 71-year-old wife Mrs Deborah muselman diagnosed with dementia in 2020 had been physically aggressive here before no sir my wife has diena yes I was told it's getting worse and worse she's having to break down right now she's actually quiet okay but she she has never attacked me before okay and I was trying to do dishes and she threw a shoe at me and I picked it up I said please don't do this and then she started hitting me with the shoe and I blocked her like that and she fell over I didn't push her I didn't punch her she fell over and she's just going berserk I really think she needs to go to the hospital and uh maybe okay do you mind if I check you for any injuries do what do you mind if I check you for any injuries yeah hit me on both sides of my face I I'm not saying anything about that I got bottom of a shoe okay do you have your ID on you I sure do okay is she supposed to be on any medications she is on medications okay so you mind taking it off for me sure has she taken her medication God Only Knows okay big big problem with her at this stage okay I have Coastal Care okay helping with her in fact I might have a nurse come on I don't know uh she's just screamed and screamed and screamed okay that I was going to kill her what okay I just made her dinner okay has she been drinking has she been drinking yes she's had some wine okay all right and that's not good with the medicine that she's on okay understood all right so I'm just waiting for my partner to show up really quick um that way I can go ahead and speak with her I will ask that you stay out here while I speak with her that's fine she's a prior police okay and detective in California many years ago okay and uh is there any weapons in the house I want to know about absolutely none other than the shoes okay all right um where is she located her at this moment she was in the kitchen straight back okay she just quit I mean she was screaming at top of her lungs okay haven't seen her in the window or anything okay but uh she was I've never seen her this bad she were about 3 years into dementia okay and uh it it's I I worried about this attacking thing for probably the last couple months okay but uh anyway okay all right aside from the dementia does she have any other medical problems uh no okay well she's had need Replacements hit Replacements but right now this dementia is okay nasty what's her name Deborah Deborah okay all right I'm going to go ahead and go inside to go speak with her okay pleas please do I have not but police hi debbah hi I'm officer with Police Department lady officer he threw me against the door frame and walked out okay do you mind if I track you for some injuries it's just s right here oh it hurts so bad right here okay do you mind if I check no I don't care he's a jackass he's a liar and I don't care anymore I have tried to tell him I'll help him I've tried to be understanding and this is what he does to me okay Deborah he's never hurt me like this before never he I tried to get him away and he just threw me against the door frame 26 one be advis it's clear for EMS honest to God I'm not a liar retired police officer I've never lied in my life and I still haven't he's going to tell you all kinds of Lies so walk me through deboro walk me through as far as what happened tonight this is this has happen this has been going on for a long time he's told lies about me what what kind of lies that I'm abusing something about him I am not I am not I am not I am not I am not I swear to God put me on lictor tester I am not a I'm not lying about abusing him he makes up this he's crazy no honest to God he's stupid and crazy and I mean stupid ma'am I don't mean mean-spirited I mean he's just not a smart person he lies a lot I've never never called police on him until now I just cannot live like this I I don't know ma'am I don't know if anything right here is broken I don't know all I know is that I couldn't push myself up Dera we have EMS in rout so that way they can take a look at you okay do you have any medical conditions I've got dementia dementia okay yes I do do you know what year it is uh no and I don't care okay well these are standardized procedures that we have I have a doctor okay uh who takes care of me I've got medicine that I take when was the last time you took your medication this morning this morning and are you supposed to take then I take another pill uh at bedtime and another bigger pill at bedtime with that so my doctor has me on three pills basically the different different amount I can I can tell you where they're at you're welcome to go up and and look at them or get them it's not crazy person it's not crazy person it's dementia do you know what dementia is oh my husband doesn't and he doesn't give a sh okay Miss Deborah can you tell he doesn't care about anybody but himself okay Miss Deborah can you can you tell me if you've been drinking tonight yes I did I have a glass of wine with de okay all right when when is your birthday 6 199 1951 so can you tell me what happened as far as how he pushed you and how how you ended up on the floor he was trying he was saying a bunch of stuff and he was making it up and he said I'm just going to tell him you did this and and you were this and and I said but you know that that's not true and I started to walk in there towards him and I said don't you lie and don't you do this crap with me and he pushed me aside and then I pushed him away away from me and then he threw me against this doorr okay all right I was protecting myself okay do you have any other mental health no I do not okay all right so we're going to have EMS take a look at you okay make sure that you that you are okay and that there's nothing concerning and then if you have you know what ma'am there have been times and and you know it sounds crazy he's never done this he's never harmed me before for he's yelled and spit and lied but he's never harmed me before so I can tell you now what I wouldn't have said then because I felt sorry for his his stupidity he's an uneducated stupid man and always has been I didn't care how smart he was I thought he was a loving person but he's not and so now I can tell you he is not loving he does not want to be loving he is a liar in everything he says and does put me hook me up hook me up first ask me all the questions you want to hook him up you'll find out what and who he is I'd like to know what he is cuz he's not a human being he's not a caring loving husband I have given him too many chances too many chances to treat me like his wife and care for me I've had this 3 years I was diagnosed too 3 years did he do anything no he wanted to immediately go out and hire somebody to take care of me instead him that was his idea I'm just going hire somebody I'm not going to take care you okay but he didn't so Deborah but he didn't I have to ask you these questions and it's important that you answer them for me okay swear to God I will do you do you know what year it is no and I because I've got diena I don't is it 13 I don't know I don't know okay do you know how many quarters make a dollar yeah four okay do you know who the president is M do you know what month we're in it's uh January okay all right so are there any cameras inside the household any what cameras do I have a car cameras no no okay well my phone is a camera okay were you recording the situation okay all right I I couldn't even move okay once I got thrown against here I couldn't live up my arm I couldn't sit up and I couldn't move and I God Almighty if I could I would have him arested in a moment okay he threw me against this goddamn thing Here Deborah I'm listening to you I hear you we have EMS and round so they can take a look at you do you want to try to stand up on the couch I have someone that my husband found out I have had this the first thing he wanted to do was he wanted to hire people to take care of me he didn't want to take care of me he wanted to hire people care he didn't until just recently I said I'm getting someone to help me and what does he do he steps in and said I hired this person to take care of her he did not I chose a person to help me her name is Anna and the last thing um Anna oh God Almighty it's a bird what's what's the bird uh we just got her her three daughters and a du she she works the count do you want TOA do you want to try a Sil go the cou this really hurts I I understand that and EM is going to BR out of joint this really hurts no I don't want to move okay I I don't even to think of feeling about moving okay so you guys got into an AR is her name she knows I'm a good person she comes and he wanted he didn't care anything about me he wanted to pay somebody to take care of me he didn't care pay anybody what you want I'm not taking care of you that's that's how he's treated me and that's what it's happened I had to hire someone to take care of me my my husbands swear to God oh God I can't lean on there I swear to God may I be shot down his first wife had breast cancer I didn't know him initially when she had cancer and was dying I heard his wife had cancer I didn't I did not know that I learned I learned why because I asked him I said where where why how did your wife die she had breast cancer okay where did she die well she died in the in you know on the on the sofa in the other room and I said and where were you he said I was sleeping in the bedroom I said what the [ __ ] is the matter with you your wife is dying and you I said why aren't you there with her well you know I asked her to come and join me in the bed because her concert was so Advanced she couldn't get into bed it was too high I said well what the wrong with you sitting next to her laying next to her no she needed the rest and I didn't want to bother her it's his story the same thing's going to happen with me but I won't let it happen I am getting the hell away from him before he does the same thing to me so DEA where we are at at this point again you know is would you like for us to have EMS come over here and take a look at you saying I don't mind it all but I'm trying to tell both of you there's a woman her name is Anna Anna Dove Dove I can't tell you what group she works for but she is my caretaker because my husband is not she takes me to my doctor's appointments she takes me well I can you know it's not like I'm having accents or anything I I always go to loots for breakfast every uh where's your other shoe at I don't know well he knocked me into the hair I don't know where walk right by you real quick okay I don't want to step on you okay I just want to make sure we find other shoe okay I don't know my hand how the Cup end up my hand hurts what happened with the cup 42 I don't remember Sho there you go for you know I don't know I was mad enough to to throw the cup at him okay but I don't remember doing it I was mad enough to do it but I don't remember doing it that's okay what what were you mad about always lies okay what do you li I tell him I need help and he lies what either there's nothing wrong with me or I'm trying to play a pity party okay he's crazy I swear to God I have stayed with this man because I sorry for him not love you don't long long time I have not felt love for this man but I I don't lie never lied I've always been kind I don't care who people are unless I'm afraid of them I have always been kind I have always been kind to him yeah is it okay if I take a seat right here sure okay it's a pretty Dar uncomfortable seat too is it it is well we're about to find out oh it is very comfortable yeah not bad huh all right so can we have a conversation real quick absolutely okay so I'm going to be straightforward with you okay I will be too okay I believe it mhm all right so you were a detective for a long time right I was a police officer for a number of years then I was a detective for a number of years child in for of child uh sex crimes and stuff like that and sexual assault okay all right so I'm going to be straightforward with you and I'm going to tell you exactly how what I would like to happen ab and and it's completely up to you okay I'm going to tell you what I think is the best option for t Okay so first and foremost okay and this has nothing personal against you or anything personal against him okay the way that the incident transpired tonight based off of what you said so far and what he said is that you're technically the predominant aggressive for the incident oh he always thinks that well just just listen to me he lies oh okay I'm sorry I'm sorry I have to tell you he lies all the time that's okay I got you hook me up we're not doing that me up and ask the same questions Miss Deborah okay I'm just telling you I'm not a li I never have been and I never will you haven't lied to me at all to that and I'm just letting you know based off what you've told me and what he's told me okay all your stories match up okay that's miraculous because he lies all the time I get it okay but you just got you got to understand where I'm going okay so like I said based off the story or based off of your recollection of the events and his recollection of the events okay you're the predominant aggressor for the incident that took place t i no it's not true just listen listen to okay well I knew you'd get that I knew you'd get that from him because he lies all the time but I got it from you as well okay but I'm not going to Sugar C things for you either I'm being 100% honest with you okay so like I said you're the predominant aggressor for the incident that happened tonight okay EXC I'm I'm the predominant correct it's just based on him based off of your story and what he said no no no not true not true what is my story that says I'm aggressor towards him you told me that you got so mad that you threw a cup at him right and that's what initiated the no I did not throw a cup at him he was coming at me and I was trying to push him away well from what you told me a couple minutes ago you said that you got so mad and that you don't know what you were mad about but that you do remember he didn't know what I was mad about no no no you said you didn't know what you no I did not say no I listen I know why I'm mad when I'm mad okay I would not have told you I don't know why I was mad so what I so what where where I'm going with this okay obviously I'm not going to arrest you tonight obviously I think that's pretty clear okay but what I arrest me I just said against the Miss please allow let me let me let me talk okay because you're you're not listening to every single word that I say I said I am not no but I always have to be the one to do it Miss Deborah I'm telling you I am not going to arrest you tonight but what I am telling you is that you were found to be the ATA party for the incident that took place tonight by whose statement the liar by the liar no no I told you this would happen he lies all the time I told you this would happen no it has been too many goddamn years that he's lied every single time and pointed the finger at me I am not a liar hook me up please hook me up I'll prove to you I'm not the li no you can make this choice I can tell you I can prove I can prove by the machine you get to decide I can prove by the machine I'm not lying Miss deah I'm not putting you on a lie detor I'm not doing any of that you're accusing me of being the aggressor you are yet that well that's not true okay that's not true M you're not understanding what I'm trying to no I do understand I've heard it before he lies all the time and I've heard it before ma'am if you were going to jail tonight you would be in handcuffs already is not happening okay deor what I'm trying to why isn't he going to the jail he threw me against the door frame why isn't he going to jail I didn't throw him against anything I didn't harm him in any way you tell me why he is not going to jail we can have a conversation but you're not going to yell at me I'm trying to have a conversation no but you're really ready to throw me someplace my husband physically threw me against the the door frame I understand where you're no I don't understand what you're where you're at you think it's okay for my husband to throw me across the room absolutely not but you're also not letting you said you were going to let me talk to you no you've already said that you decided that I was the aggressor you didn't let me yes you did you said more than once I was it was obvious that I was the aggressor bull he threw me against the wall but I'm the aggressor right you're not letting me finish oh yes I have let you finish you're finished you're finished you are finished i m you are taking his side you don't know what I'm not I'm actually taking where's the hospital where's the one that's going to take an x-ray of this we're waiting on EMS to get here so they can oh yeah uhhuh you know what EMS is on the way to come to you so that you can get your shoulder extra yep yep yep and as soon as go away please I'll Stand I'll St with this officer go away please I'm sick and tired of men lying about me and to me I'm sick and tired of you choosing him when you don't know I said put him on a li detector he lies all the time somebody please test the man somebody believe me okay you know lie detectors aren't admissible in court so I don't care in court you can at least once you hear and see what it is you can say to him I don't care about court you can say to him listen Mister you're lying I know you're lying stop touching her stop harassing her I'm not asking you to put him in jail I'm asking you to tell him to stop stop this [ __ ] stop this lying okay my whole personality is gone now because of him I am loving caring I am always offering help to everybody I believe you and I always have no you don't you listen to him and you said I was the aggressor okay no it's not okay you said it's okay it's okay it's not okay you listen to him and you just told me that you now believe that I was the aggressor I do well that's too bad because you're the imbecile that he now has on his side again that's no it's not fun it is not fun I don't care who you are or what gender you are I am sick and tired of you guys sticking together as Pals you don't know this man you don't know anything about it give it a try have him tested at least give him a try give me a try asking these questions on a lie detector and you will godamn know who's lying and it's not me I'm sick and tired of him telling people it's me it's not me and I don't like your attitude towards me I'm sorry I don't like your attitude towards me before you've taken any test or know anybody you listen to him okay you didn't listen to me you listen to him and you said Oh no you're the aggressor you're the aggressor ma'am you're the aggressor you said it two or three times get the hell out of my house I'd like to talk to this lady in private please absolutely go sure thing no way I'm going to have that man call me an aggressor he doesn't even know who the I am or what was supposed to be said or done DEA I need you to lower your voice please oh yeah uh-huh me it's always my fault he called me a liar doesn't know a thing about me he called me a li he called me a li okay you know what I'll call the police department I want his badge number I want everything I can about him he's calling me a liar Deborah he's calling me a liar no can I talk to you no I am not a liar this man not you I have nothing against you this man called me a liar when he just decided he just decided for a lying man Deborah that it was my fault I'm trying to talk to you nope nobody's trying to talk to me nobody is trying to talk to me this man is telling me I'm get the problem no trying to talk to you but you were yelling and I'm not going to be no I there a hell of a lot of time you could have been talking to me instead this guy goes out there and comes back and calls me a liar debah at no point did he call you a liar yes he did no he he called me a liar right here he said I was the aggressor he called me a liar I said I was not and he called me a liar yeah call seven of them you don't you don't get to call me a liar you don't get to call me a liar because this man said I was the aggressor because my husband will always say she's an aggressor you know what you're useless you're useless to me I'm sure you're nice people you're useless to me you don't give a rat what this man has said because he lies real well he's lied all his life and he lies real well I don't make up this [ __ ] I said put me on a goddamn lie detector you will know who's a liar in the meantime I don't leave my house in the meantime you don't get to come into my house put me on a lie detector put him on a lie detector and then maybe I will agree for you to come back into my house but in the meantime I'm sick and tired of everybody saying it's your fault and not the fault go I'm asking you to leave my house I don't want your help I don't want your help I don't want your help we past that that's just too bad get out of my house yes it doesn't yes get out of why why because I don't believe you why because you don't believe me listen to me Miss deborra listen to me we're not going to have a conversation with you yelling at me could have listened to a sing word that you said I I've had a lot of discussion with you before I got in that's right but what I'm telling you is me and you are not going to have a conversation with you continuously go no ma'am we're past that no where's my husband huh is he told to leave no I can't make him leave his own house but I can nobody's making you leave anywhere but we're also in a situation right now now where as I've told you before we're waiting on the ambulance to get here so speak I'm not going anywhere I'm not going anywhere you can't force me to go into an ambulance I am not leaving this house but you said I am not I've changed my mind you said you wanted to go get your shoulder x-ray I did not you did I said I would allow my shoulder to be x-rayed I didn't say I was willing to go and get anywhere I said I was you know what prove your point get the hat out get out my house no ma'am yes no ma'am okay I'll call another police officer why do you think you can take over my home the officer contacted the mobile crisis unit out of concern for Mrs melman's mental state EMS arrived and checked Mrs muslk arm determining it was not broken she refused medical treatment on scene from what we've been able to gather you were a violent and aggressive toward your husband first that's not true he lies all the time it is not true but you know what you are bound determin on me you want to believe what he's saying but you're not believing what I say how is it that you know that he's telling the truth and I'm lying because it's just the opposite but what makes you think that because you don't like ladies no you don't believe women what is it officer do I have to take moving pictures you can tell that jackass up there anything you want to but he's not going to pick me up and abuse me ma'am the problem we're at right now is that he's told us the entire side of the story and he lies all the time listen you told us that you got really angry at him and that you threw a cup at him right you said that you couldn't remember what led up to it and now you can't remember what happened I'm not saying he was lying he was lying those were your were that's what you said you said that you got really angry at him and you threw a cup at him you couldn't remember why and you aren't and it's not your fault but you're not able to remember the entire events of what happened okay but based off you can't wait to say you got demena you can't oh that's all I've heard since you got here get the hell away from me I want to breathe I'm not going anywhere we have a sergeant that's coming here I'm standing right here okay this is ridiculous my husband picked me up and threw me against the wall and at no time have they removed him from the house place your hands for missra why place your hands behind your let let your hands go why just place your hands behind your back I will not my husband physically abused me tonight and you're wreting me what the hell is the matter with you no I will not put my hands behind my back they already are I will not you don't have a choice m m stop before you get hurt nobody want to hurt oh you're not going to hurt me I can tell you you're not hurting me and you hurt me you can go up and have a party with my husband it's a let's throw away deorah today no it's not we want to help you as much as we can don't he threw me against the wall with that side you got to let go go and put this one in I have this one and we're still going to have somebody come out and talk to you yeah me okay my husband throws me against a wall no my husband threw me don't that hurts that is the shoulder that hurts you in front we'll cuff you in front M get put your other hand right here for me all right just put your hand in the cff no I want to go to the hospital now okay I'm not going with you I'm going to the hospital all right well we we we can transport you there I have got a choice mister I have got a choice my husband physically abused me and I don't have a choice he threw me against a wall and I don't have a choice no you don't understand you really do not understand you let go of that goddamn arm it hurts but then when my husband throws me against the wall everybody should be thrown against the wall right he lies all the time sir and I don't care what you believe he lies all the time and I'm sick and tired of this [ __ ] okay Miss Debra put on your shoes goad and put your shoes on for me Miss Deborah put your shoes on please I'm not going to anywhere without my belongings I have it right here it's coming with you my belongings we can't bring everything my handbag has everything in it it has my ID it has everything in it grab your ID out of it no my whole handbag has to go there okay we we can get your handbag that's fine the hell's the matter it wasn't bad enough my husband threw me against the wall now I can't have my handbag with me you you can Mrs muan was arrested for simple battery and taken to the hospital for medical clearance she claimed to be the victim but the doctor found no injuries insisting she was at the wrong hospital and refusing to sit she was discharged and transported to the Detention Center [Music]
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