still as painful as it was then I just deal with it a little better now than I used to and I felt guilty I felt like I let my guys down so Mikey who was my teal at the time they hit a Target out in Western Iraq same rotation uh ended up with like 37 holes in his body from fragmentation injuries uh and two other guys on the team were shot and a couple other guys in the troop were shot all in one target house I felt like if I'd have been there some or all of that wouldn't have happened